Adventures in Camping with 
Scoop Jackson

Hello Everyone! This is Scoop Jackson, here to tell you strange but true Adventures In Camping!   Quick Links right here or scroll down for the full 'Scoop' effect!

Scoop's e-books: 'EVIL CAMP' & 'Adventures In Camping'

99 cents @ ! Such a deal!

   

                                                                                   Y/A--scare the kids!     25 years of mishaps!

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Scoop's Cast of Characters  

 Awesome Andy's Guide To Bars In Whitewater--If you're a UW Whitewater student or thinking about it, you need to read Andy's reviews! This is quite possibly the most important information you will need to know to survive! 

Note from Scoop: I am grateful to be published in The Camper's Courier each summer, but you can keep up-to-date on happenings in this area all year-round by checking out www.miltoncourieronline.com

                

Maybe your own camping tales are a bit on the mild side. That's OK--mild can be good. But perhaps you'd like to take a look at the other side of camping, a humorous side I've seen for over 20 years.  I'm talking about mudwrestling with angry Nuns, eating Vegamite with half-naked Australians, and being chased by a rabid, bullet-proof raccoon.  These are just a few of the things that were bound to happen here at the campground in southern Wisconsin I call home.

I must ask one favor of you...don't point snickering fingers at the ill-fated people my NewsHounds have caught in the act--it could happen to you! Don't think so, eh? Never fell asleep with your Nikes roasting in a campfire? Never got Duct-taped to a lawn chair or a tree after too many Old Styles? How about having to call for the Honey-Wagon when everyone else around you is eating breakfast? Ugh!

These are all true tales involving real people, and I've been telling them for many years in our local paper. Now it's time to share these tales on the Internet. 

"But why, Scoop?" you ask. Well, thanks for asking, and let me tell you why: 

BIG-TIME WARNING!!! As I said, Beware! Traumatic events can happen to you anytime you are camping. To be safe, check this site every month for new stuff to be aware of. After all, you'd pay top-dollar for a guide in Alaska so you wouldn't get chewed up by a Grizzly, right? So what about a horny Wisconsin badger (the animal!) accidentally eating your Viagra? Or a bee in your morning tequila? The dangers are endless, and often humiliating. 

                                Think about it. Let me help.

                             THE SCOOP:

Yeah, Mike! Photo (c) Dan Wiegel

Golf Cart Rally Injures Pants and Pride! Plus: TCB: The Dirty Underside of Camping! And a great refreshing drink recipe, PLUS more! (including a secret tip!). Go there here!

 

Here we go again! New column soon! Have a great summer! Check out "Drink, Dine & Dance for fun stuff to do...

Check out how you can be the first on your block to receive the new 'Golden Star' Certificate, autographed by Scoop, suitable for framing and destined to be worth big bucks...or maybe not...  Click here!  

                       Check often! Missed a month or two? Go to:

Mooning Incident Brings Revenge, you 'Betcher Sweet (b)ASS'! Plus True Romance: Stuck Like Glue, and a Golf Cart Rally Public Service Announcement! Right HERE!

Big-Time Contest 2010: Your 'Worst Camping Trip Ever!' Stories & Winners plus 'Walking Talking History'  (and keep sending those tales in for future columns!)   Check it out HERE

The 'Craig'-A-Pult Has Arrived! Amazing Travel Invention has zero % accuracy, but inventors "still confident!"   plus...The Return of Tim 'B.': Golf Cart Knowledge 101   Here you go!
Beware What Lurks Below Your Deck--Arrrr! (A Pirate Tale) plus Scoop Jr's Worst Camping Trip Ever--Woodstock II (ugh!)  go there now!
 
Female Campers, you need to read this if you are tired of filthy toilets and possible snakes: STAND TALL!  PLUS a heart-warming TRANSPLANT STORY and SCHOOL'S OUT with Alice & Obama! It's all here, Folks!
Jeff Russell needs your help, and you can have fun doing it! Click here!
SCOOP'S ECONOMIC RECOVERY PLAN: Camping for Fun and Profit!  Click here for big $$$!

21 BIKE SALUTE FOR A SOLDIER HOME ON LEAVE and THE GOLF CART GUY RETURNS WITH AN AMAZING ADVENTURE!

WHAT EVERY CAMPER SHOULD KNOW! Plus some bathroom humor and WALKING TALKING HISTORY with Norm Piper and, of course...more!
THE COUGAR STRIKES! Plus: A Handy Reference Guide To Dangerous Animals; what got left out of the print version, and rare photos!
SANTA GETS SPANKED! Scoop Jr.'s tribulations as he pub-crawls for a good cause...ouch! Plus: parents, don't let your impressionable kids see this picture!
PUMP ROOM UPDATE #3: Movin' On Up! Plus...Scoop Rants (& Raves): John Fogerty concert, Ambassador East, Second City, and cab drivers!
CAMPING KATRINA STYLE  What we saw on Mississippi's Coast and in New Orleans Feb. '07   CLICK HERE
DRINK & DINE a la SCOOP What Mrs. Scoop and I do for fun in southern Wisconsin--a valuable guide for all campers! Plus an important GPS Tip...don't get lost!
ANIMAL HAZARDS! Beware what lurks at your site: Woodchucks, Snappers, Monkeys, and Spiders, oh my!  PLUS: How not to fix your room addition--valuable building tips you'll only find here!
Scoop's 2007 Safety Tips:  Yes, somehow it's all alcohol-related! Read this column, or you could poke your eye out!
DID YOU MEET THE BEATLES IN 1964 AT MIDWAY AIRPORT? If so, we need your HELP!!
SCOOP INVADES CHICAGO! Secret Two-Year Mission Accomplished...but Scoop needs your help ASAP! Plus King Tut, Jeff Beck...and more! Update!     Update #2!--foiled again!
TSUNAMI HITS WISCONSIN LAKE...Phil Skortz Goes Tubing! Plus Gornoman goes for a dip, and Life Imitates Art as Local Ladies Just Want To Have Fun!
BURNING DOWN THE HOUSE! What the Milwaukee Fire Department does for fun...and for a good cause! PLUS a Couch Potato WARNING! And a hot makeshift recipe!
Rampaging Raccoons and Giant Spiders...the joys of camping! Plus a tasty spider-eating tip you'll be glad you know! Plus The Golf Cart Guy gets another question...
Meet The Golf Cart Guy! Got a question concerning your machine? The Golf Cart Guy is the man to talk to! He will answer your golf cart questions, and if you doubt his wisdom, read what he has done...plus, of course, more!
Scoop's Vegas Tips 2006  plus CONFESSIONS OF A 50+ VIRGIN! Can you resist???

Best Little Cathouse In Town!

Giant Sea Creature Attacks Innocent Floating Women! plus: A Rafting Ride To Hell!
Tim Briggs: Unsafe At Any Speed! Tim water-skis on blacktop and winds up in pain AND in the doghouse!
HOW TO BUILD A CAMPFIRE...or maybe not! PLUS the 'Tootsinator': Arm-Wrestling Champ; The Dragon Lady Almost Bites Jimmy Barnes In The Butt; The Dingle Berry Tree; and exclusive photos!
THE BUTLER DID IT...in his shorts! PLUS the sad tale of the Little Yellow Dog, the Ultimate Honey Wagon, and a great camping RECIPE! And more!
The Power of Scoop: in which a long-lost love is discovered! Yes, we're talking cheese-curds here! PLUS a great curd recipe!

SCOOP RAMBLES ON: Strictly personal nostalgia...read everything else first! A Sword-Swallower, meeting the Beatles, and more.

A Scoop Two-fer: Safety Tips for 2004... 

                    Running With Scissors &

 Pay Attention While I'm Babbling

Meet the 'Female fart Detectives' and 'The Human Fire Hydrant'. If you're ever going to sit in a saloon again, you need to read this!!!

The Gambling Voodoo Blues

Scoops' Vacation Tips 2004

I begin my winter vacation on a sad note...but the show must go on. Gambling with Voodoo dolls, Memphis blues, Graceland, and more...

Mud Wrestling with Angry Nuns Pt. 1 & Pt. 2...a love story!

plus new links to time-wasting sites and new Camping Info Links!

Jimmy Barnes Wanted For Murder!

Throws Girlfriend Into Lake--Dramatic Rescue by Prominent Local Citizen! "Just 'Trailer Trash'," says Jimmy of ex-girlfriend 'Doll'. Explicit photos and more!  

RUBBER PANCAKES AND A TASTY REVENGE! Plus a Deadly Breakfast Drink, and Jimmy Barnes Gets Investigated by CBS NEWS...sort of!
Scoop Investigates 'The Case of the Smoking Toilet!' Plus a 'bug-free' recipe for breakfast, and a local camper gets 'Bird-Brained!' And Jimmy Barnes gets investigated by CBS...sort of! Of course it's all true! PLUS 'Hot' photos!
"SCOOP DOES VEGAS!"  It's 'Quality Time' as Scoop, Mrs. Scoop, & Scoop Jr. hit Sin City for 8 nights of mayhem! PLUS a Super Bowl not to be forgotten, and Scoop's 'Survivor Tips'!  THE 500# DEADLY DUCK OF DOOM featuring a crazed monster mouse, a half-naked Australian woman, and the infamous JIMMY BARNES !
HOW I SPENT MY WINTER VACATION A death-defying trip through 10 states on a secret mission! THE JIMMY BARNES TRIBUTE PAGE! Check this out!!!
an innocent TRIVIA CONTEST goes horribly awry! Try your luck: 4 Rounds of puzzling trivia, PLUS Mrs. Finstermocker is found, and Scoop gets an apology! PLUS: The Vulture builds a magnificent Finstermocker Shrine!

Urine Attack Irritates Local Gopher! plus Scoop's GOLDEN STAR CERTIFICATE! You too can own one! PLUS 'Ask Scoop'!

TALKING TO TURTLES: Meet Cap't Mitch, a 'Turtle-Whisperer', if you may...a daring rescue at sea! PLUS meet my 'CAST OF CHARACTERS'! Spit, Thongs, Ding-Dongs, and Probes:  URBAN CAMPING LEGENDS UNCOVERED! 5*s!
TALKING SNAKEHEADS--with, once again, the infamous Jimmy Barnes!  Scoop's Annual 'SEX & CAMPING' column...plus Jimmy Barnes and his 'Stinking Fountain of Love', and the Girl with the World's Longest Tongue! 
LP vs. Charcoal: a Discussion, in which Scoop and Cap't Kirk fight giant radioactive spiders, and Mrs. Scoop gets mad about her tubes! Plus Safety Tips!  Yes, it's ANIMALS ON VIAGRA, plus 'The Deadly Rake', and politicians on golf carts...yes, mud-slinging is involved! 

Scoop's Book of the Month Club: Buy this cookbook and eat and die happy...or sad...or in a mental institution--which is where some of these recipes might have come from!  THE DYSFUNCTIONAL GOURMET   Recipes For People Just Crazy About Food

Scoop Goes Golfing! Watch out! Scoop's Christmas Greeting

Hey You! Yeah, You! Who Is Reggie R. Marplot? Who is Mrs. Finstermocker? And why do I want to know? Read All About It!!!

 enter the Shadows

 Scoop The Hand          (campfire)    Scoop    Rat-Tale (alone!)             

                                                            

CALLING ALL EDITORS! Wouldn't a collection of my columns make a great book? I have over 40 articles at present, with many more to come. Arranged in chronological order, they make for a compelling story of strange camping tales, with ongoing characters stumbling in and out. Just e-mail me with a query and I'll send a complete outline of my ideas. Big-screen TV, here you come!

Legal Stuff and Thanks: All stories are true, unless I have offended someone, in which case I was deluded by beer or gin, take your pick, and my lawyer can beat your lawyer any day, so there. The entire contents of this Web-Site copyright 1990-2010 by Paul McMurray aka Scoop Jackson. A very big THANKS to Tom Whitney, Jill Whitney, and Bob Fugate, without whom there would be no Scoop Web-Site, which might be a good thing, but too bad! And thanks, Mrs. Scoop, for putting up with me! I love you!

I certainly hope you enjoy meeting the people in these tales. They are real, and most have become good friends. Let me know if you're visiting Wisconsin, and you can meet them too. Unless you're afraid to. I wouldn't blame you a bit...   

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